I’m going to share with you all a personal moment in my life, when I didnt feel so pretty or good enough body wise. Being on social media and comparing myself to the people I saw on there. It was hard not seeing ppl on there that looked like myself.  I became self conscious and it showed in my personality towards others. It was after I had my 2nd son. My weight refuse to go down.  I didnt know how to deal with it or what to do to fix it. I had only one idea …..starve myself.  Yes, I know some of you personal trainers out there probably cringed when you read that but hey I didnt know any better at the time and I really had no one to teach me differently.  Starving myself seemed like it was working until my hair started falling out. Oh and I started getting a fever. And don’t get me started on the constant constipation, no energy and I even developed acid.  reflux. On top of all of that yall, I ended up gaining more weight. I couldn’t understand what I was doing wrong.  No eating = skinny …..right?     WRONG !!!!!!


My body was refusing to let go of the food I was eating because it didn’t know when it would get its next meal. Starving myself was having the opposite effect on my body. WTH !!!!???

After a couple of years of this, I realized that I wasn’t helping myself but hurting myself.  It wasn’t until I almost put myself into the hospital that I realized that the root of my problems was that I didn’t have any self love..  omg, I didn’t love myself. I didnt need to work on my weight, I needed to work on loving myself. Wow!! That hit me like a ton of bricks. So I shifted my thoughts from being over weight to how do I start loving myself. Which in return helped me to lose weight in the process. I started by researching ways to love yourself.

1st, was accept yourself just as you are, even if your not where you want to be. Now I must be honest, I knew this was going to be a hard one for me.

2nd, I had to stop comparing myself to others. So while I was going through this process, I took a break from social media for awhile.

3rd, I started walking. I used this time to give myself compliments the whole entire walk.  Yep, sure did.

4th, I started carrying a gallon of water with me everywhwere i went.   Omg water was soooo nasty to me at first but I saw how much water weight I was getting rid of so it started encouraging me to drink more of it.

5th, I stayed off of the scale. The break up was real. Sorry scale but we need to take break from each other for awhile.

6th, I started eating 5 small meals a day. High protein low carb meals.

After awhile of this, I could feel a change in my body and the way that I was feeling about myself.

I begin to realize that there was nothing wrong with my body. It was my mind that needed a diet.  I also started to realize that I wasn’t the only one going through this body shame thing. Both men and women feel this way. After more research I realized young girls and boys are experiencing this shame at an early age at an alarming rate. 

I knew I had to do something to help people  overcome this feeling of self hate but how?

I didnt have the answer back then but when I started photography, I kept running into the same problem with my clients being afraid to do photoshoots because of their ” love handles, stretch marks, big butts,  face, or because of their weigh gain as a whole.  Thats when the light bulb  went off.  I noticed how beautiful and confident they felt after doing a boudoir shoot or something a little sexy.  I enjoyed seeing the self love they found by looking at themselves in a way that they never did before.   I decided that boudoir was a way for me to help, teach and give back all at the same time. 

We are all beautiful. Everyone is not suppose to be skinny.  Some of us are suppose to be voluptuous queens And teddy bear kings. Who doesn’t still love their favorite teddy bear?  Stop being hard on yourselves and show more love and admiration.  C’mon look at yourself in the mirror, blow a kiss at yourself and own that shit….


Do you #love yourself? Like really love yourself? If your answer is yes. Let me stop in my tracks and say #congratulations. Its such a beautiful inner feeling. Many people unfortunately never experience that feeling. I realize that now more than ever. Shit, I use to be that person who didn’t love myself as strongly as I should . For some, it began as a child.. With other’s it happend through life’s experiences. Some of us,both male and female are not taught how to love ourselves by our parents or in school. We had to learn these lessons on our own #life #journey. This is the reason why I love doing photography. #Photography is a great self esteem booster. In my line of work, I meet alot of people who are dealing with self image issues, low self esteem, and body shame just to name a few. I like to capture the parts of you that you love about yourself. Both men and women have the same issues about themselves. Some clients like only their eyes. So I capture their eyes in a photograph that they love. Building self esteem has to start somewhere. My hope is to build off the parts of themselves that they love and work our way up to full self love. Seeing yourself in a beautiful light does wonders for a person. I always say, everyone has a story. I just want to be the one who is blessed to share it through my photography.

I am based out of #Columbus #Georgia. I would love to start traveling doing #selfesteem building and #boudoir photoshoots . If your ever in need of a #photoshoot feel free to contact me http://www.tonyadeshawnphotography.com FB: Tonya deshawn IG: TonyaDeshawn

Here’s my latest photoshoot……enjoy😉


My name hov!!! Ohhh!!! H to the ov.. Lol

Ok. Ok. Enough of that before I get hyped and start doing some of my best moves ever..

My name is Tonya Deshawn. I live in Columbus Georgia. Its an hour and a half from Atlanta Georgia. I was raised in Brooklyn New York, Brownsville to be exact. A few years ago, I decided to learn the art of photography. I take that back, I didnt decide, it was decided for me lol ( thanks hubby). My husband decided to buy a camera and hand it to me to take his pictures for a video shoot. At that moment, I had no idea what I was doing but after an hour or so, one would have thought I was a pro by the way I was snapping. Which reminds me to tell you, always be open minded how your gifts and talents introduce themselves to you. Sometimes, it happens in the strangest most unexpected ways. Just be open to try new things. Anyways, I decided to go to photography school for 5 months and become certified in Digital photography because I immediately fell in love with it. I started doing photoshoots and getting really good feedback. In March 2020, I decided to rent a small space and launch my very first photography studio all while shaking in my boots might I add. Lol It was a very proud moment for me because for the 1st time in awhile, I didnt allow fear to discouraged me. If you’d like, feel free to check out my portfolio on my website, FB & IG http://www.tonyadeshawnphotography.com

What kind of photography do I take? Boudoir Photography, Engagements, Headshots, Lifestyle, Business, Party Events, and street photography.

Eventually, I will travel all over, only specializing in Boudoir Photography like this.


My husband just turned 67 years old on August 10th. I cant get over how young he looks. I mean…….what kind of vitamins are you taking sir? What kind of holy water fountain are you drinking from? Maybe it’s because your vegan. It looks like hes full of juices and berries. If you dont believe me check out the rest of his recent pictures from a photoshoot I did with him.
See!!!! I told you !!!! This man is amazing. At 67 years old, he chases after the mailman every saturday because he cant stay off of amazon website. The crazy part yall is that he chases the mailman with his shoes off…. doesnt that just turns you on?
This is my husband sitting down thinking. See when your 67 years old, it’s hard for you to think with your head up because your neck is weaker at that age. So the gravity of a his bighead pulls his neck down.
Oh !! And on this picture, I think hes looking at my butt. I’m probably bending over picking up some carrots off of the floor for him to snack on. I cant explain to you why he loves dirty carrots but my guess is he think he is bugs bunny or something. But anyways you guys, this is my antique 67 yr old husband. P.s. this was fun to write. I hope you enjoyed and had a good laugh today…
P.s.s. Hes also a personal trainer.
This is he and CT Fletcher in Las Vegas 2019. CT is like your how….old MF??? !!! Lol (jk jk ) If you have fitness questions, he would be glad to answer them for you. You can follow him on youtube, instagram and fb under ” avid athletics”


I decided to step out on faith and invest in myself by becoming the 1st entrepreneur in my immediate family. I am proud of myself and I hope I make my family proud as well.
I am located in Columbus, Georgia. It’s a 1 hour in a half away from Atlanta, Georgia.
My website is http://www.tonyadeshawnphotography.com

I was trying to be cute right here lol
Ok. Right here, I knew I was kinda cute lolol.
I am a photographer and I love Macro and Boudoir photography.

#birthdayboy #birthday #happybirthday #love #dog #birthdaycake #cute #happy  #party #cake #family #instagood #photooftheday #birthdayparty #bday #photography #follow  #like #fun #instagram #birthdayfun #son #gift

Dear Lj, 

Today you turned 17 years old.  Wow!  Where has the time gone? It seems as though just yesterday I was changing your diapers. As I look at you today,  I get kinda emotional because I am soooo extremely  proud of the young man that you’ve become.  You have always been such a good kid  growing up.  I watch you open doors for every female you see (even if they take a long time getting to the door lol 😆), how you are there for me the entire time when I’m not feeling well,  how excited you get over funny or not so funny youtube videos😂, how you swear that you have the best dance moves ever in life, and how your maturing and thinking differently.  Oh and have I told you how much I love to hear you sing/ rap your favorite songs? You have excellent taste in music,  you have never been in any kind of trouble in school or out of school, you make friends easily and everyone loves you once they meet you.  I look forward to watching you continue to grow and mature into the man you have chosen to become in this life.  I love you and I really appreciate your spirit.  Its so genuine and real.  Im glad to be your mom. 

Love ❤ always, 

Ma


 JustGoShoot #InstaGood #InstaPhoto #PicOfTheDay #PhotoOfTheDay #Photogram #Capture #Photography #Camera #Composition #Photoshop #Instadaily #Igers #birthdayparty #HDR #HDRspotters #Instafocus #IGworldclub #Visuals #Aesthetics #ThroughTheLens #Snapshot #Exposure #Moment 

  I was asked to be the photographer at a young ladies 40th birthday party this month.  It was an old school  disco themed party.  When I was asked,  I jumped at the opportunity to experience adding the title event photographer to my portfolio.  I was actually nervous and super excited at the same time.  I was determined to get perfect shots.  I am a very professional person so I made sure that I arrived 30 mins early to the event,  I took pictures non stop,  i made sure to turn my phone on silent, I didn’t eat or drink anything at the party and to think of it,  I never took a bathroom break. The birthday girl gave me a time line that she wanted me to follow and gave me a list of pictures that she wanted me to take.  I made sure to preset my smart watch to vibrate every time i needed to move on to the next thing on my list.  My favorite pictures on that list were the candid shots.  You know,  the ones where they’re not paying much attention to you.  I loved catching them in their natural element laughing, talking,  slapping high 5’s,  dancing or even  taken selfies.  I actually gained alot of knowledge that night and by stepping outside of my comfort zone,  I taught myself a very valuable lesson….. Always Follow your butterflies.   


Here are a few pics from the party


#maternityshoot #maternityphotography #maternity #baby #pregnancy #love #photography #pregnant #newbornphotography #momtobe #maternityfashion #family  #maternityphotoshoot #babybump #mom #newborn #familyphotography #photographer #maternitystyle #photooftheday #photoshoot #motherhood #newbornbaby #babyboy #babylove #mum #portrait #cute 
So, today I did my first maternity photoshoot.  I was excited yet nervous at the same time.  The model name is Keyonna.  Shes 19 years old and will be having her first child in September.  Keyonna is naturally beautiful so she didn’t need much makeup. I love ❤ this lipstick on her by coloured raine.  It has a blue base to it which works perfectly with keyonna’s skintone.  I did a shot on the train track. Wait a minute……… did I just say that I did a shot on the train  tracks?  Doesn’t that sound  dangerous lolol.  Ok  ok  let me rephrase that whole sentence.  I photographed her on the train tracks. There!!!  Sounds better.

This picture was taken at a park where there were alot of huge flat rocks and trees. Its actually named “flat rock park”.   I wanted her to be able to look back years from now and see the beautiful miracle she had growing inside of her.

this picture is probably one of my favorites.  Why?  Well im so glad you asked.  Its because she looks so fly maaan, So polished, so confident,  so melanin popping ish.  And yes,  I just made that word up.  Thats all I got for yall.  I don’t know what else you want me to say.  Shes beautiful.

This last look is of keyonna mysteriously wearing a wedding veil.  Why did I choose to have her wear a veil?  Ok. Ok. I’ll tell you.  I just looove when yall ask questions.  I simply chose a veil to throw you off.  Its an attention getter.  You immediately look at it and wonder about it.  Yet you can still see how it brings out her beauty.  I love to throw in stuff that doesn’t make sense yet creates a beautiful picture.

I hope you’ve enjoyed my photography.

Don’t forget to “Like” and “Follow”

Love ❤, Tonya Deshawn
o​​​


#naturalhair #hair #blackgirlmagic #curlyhair #beauty #melanin #fashion #protectivestyles #love #natural #model #teamnatural #naturalhairstyles #beautiful #hairstyles #makeup #healthyhair #art #hairstylist #photography #hairgoals #curls #afro #naturalhaircommunity #melaninpoppin #like #hairgrowth #braids #style #bhfyp

Have you ever heard of bentonite clay before?

Well, you may be very surprised to hear that individuals in various cultures refer to it as a “healing clay” that detox the body and hair.

In fact, many people enjoy bentonite clay benefits by using it externally on the skin. You can feel the tightening effect on your face and body but im going to talk to you about detoxing your hair using a bentonite clay mask using just 3 ingredients (bentonite powder, apple cider vinegar and coconut oil)

First, let me tell you a little about it. What is bentonite clay? It’s actually composed of ash made from volcanos. The largest known source of bentonite clay is found in Fort Benton, Wyoming, where numerous volcanos are present.

Bentonite Clay

 

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Incredibly powerful, possessing a negative charge (anionic). This makes it an ideal clay for cleansing and detoxifying, as it has the ability to remove positively charged (cationic) conditioners and products that can build up on the hair and scalp. It is also said to have the ability to draw out toxins, heavy metals, chemicals, and impurities. It helps cleanse and lift impurities from the hair, aiding in conditioning, shine, softness, and definition.

Apple cider Vingear

 

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Serves as an antimicrobial agent (warding off infection), and helps ease the itching and flakiness associated with scalp conditions such as dandruff, psoriasis, and seborrheic dermatitis. ACV is also able to improve the shininess of hair and increase moisture retention by causing cuticles to lay flat via pH balancing the hair. Through this same mechanism, it is also believe that Apple Cider Vinegar can correct hair porosity issues.

Coconut Oil

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Oil with a high saturated fat content, rich in vitamins and nutrients beneficial to the hair. Due to its low molecular weight, coconut is one of the few oils proven to actually penetrate the hair shaft. It protects and coats the hair, and prevents protein loss.
DIY clay mask has forever changed my natural life. Because It hydrates, moisturizes, de-frizzes, softens, shine and reshape your curl pattern. I needed a detox because I was experiencing dryness and my curls needed some attention.
What You’ll Need:
a plastic or glass bowl (never use anything metal)
a plastic, wooden, or rubber stirring utensil

1/2 cup (or 4oz) of bentonite clay

2 tablespoon of coconut oil but I use more
6 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar (unfiltered)

Directions
Add the clay first, then the oils, in your mixing bowl. You can begin stirring if you like, or leave it all until the very end (I prefer to stir after everything is all in). Next, add your 6 tablespoons of apple cider vinegar. Allow it to foam for 10-15 seconds before adding in the coconut oil. The reaction between the clay and apple cider vinegar is essential to avoiding a lumpy mix.
Stir everything together until you have a smooth mixture that is roughly the consistency of yogurt.

It should look like this after all the ingredients are mixed together

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Apply the mask to clean, damp or wet hair from root to end with your fingers. I advise the use of plastic gloves because it will get pretty messy.
To ensure even coverage, work in small sections. If your hair begins to dry while applying the mask, keep a spray bottle nearby to spritz and keep the hair damp, but not dripping wet. After you’ve completely coated your hair with the mask, cover it with a plastic cap for 20-30 minutes, sometimes longer. You can use a hooded dryer or steamer for extra penetration, or just let the heat from your head do all the work.
When you’re ready to rinse, I highly recommend hopping in the shower. It will be incredibly difficult to get the clay out under the power of a sink faucet alone.

follow up with a conditioner of choice. I personally like giovanni deep conditioner. Rake it through your hair from ends to root, and let it sit for about 5 minutes then rinse.

Your end result will be hydrated, ultra-moisturized, soft, frizz-free, uber-defined hair.

Try it and let me know how amazing your hair look and feels.

Thank me later.

Yours truly,
Tonya deshawn

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